Hard Lessons - Contentment

April 2011

Oh, no! My granddaughter's college senior piano recital is at the end of this month and I'm not going to be well enough to drive to Kansas!  God, are You sure? 

During the week that I fully expected to be in KS, I wrote in my journal of things I was trying to be and/or learning to be thankful for:
~ missing Lexi's recital
~ hard lessons
~ pain intense
~ loved by God
~ He loves me enough to "put me down" (home bound)
~ He loves me enough to clean me up (of luke-warmness)
~ quiet early morning by the fire
~ joy
~ what He is teaching me through the pain of shingles

In my daily devotions the morning of April 30, 2011, I read in "Voices from the Past" - Puritan Devotionals:
When Samuel told Eli that God would judge his house, 'It is the LORD,' said Eli, 'Let Him do what seems good to Him.'
In the storm it is the humble heart that exercises patience. I am afflicted says the humble soul, but it is a mercy I am not destroyed. Though I have fallen into a pit, it is free grace that I have not fallen into hell. God is too just to wrong me, and too gracious to harm me; and therefore I will be still and quiet; let Him do what He will with me.
Remember, it is not easy in affliction and tribulation to hold our peace, yet it is very advantageous.
-Thomas Brooks, 17th cent.


January 6, 2013

Today, January 6, I look back at 2011 and am amazed and surprised at some of my journal musings. God was quickly teaching me through my having to "be still" that He is sovereign -  I could not fix this health thing and plow my way through (like I was used to doing).

Now, nearly two years later, it's becoming (usually) my first reaction when trials come (personal, family or work related) to seek God's face first and not go into "worry 101 mode." 

Wait!  Pray first! 

Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD.
Psalm 27.14

From "My Utmost for His Highest" - by Oswald Chambers on January 4:
There are time when you cannot understand why you cannot do what you want to do. When God brings the blank space, see that you do not fill it in, but WAIT.  The blank space may come in order to teach you what sanctification means, or it may come after sanctification to teach you what service means. Never run before God's guidance. If there is the slightest doubt, then He is not guiding. Whenever there is doubt - don't!

In my thanksgiving journal for Jan. 2013:
~ the blank spaces
~ I'm less impulsive now
~ prayer
~ contentment

Blessings,
Jayne